Reading time 3 mins
Lots of Tweets, lately, about how wet and cold weather, especially in summer, negatively influences our moods. Or seems to act as a trigger for us to feel less buoyant and cheerful. This has been evoked by July and August, here in the UK, being unseasonably cool, wet and windy. (By the way, we no longer use Twitter.)
So, as you can’t get much across in a Twitter 140 character message, I thought I’d raise the topic here. This is more of a wondering blog post than a definitive clarification of what goes on.
If we use NLP to ‘model’ what many of us experience when looking out at the cool and wet August weather a number of things come to mind:
Anchoring
In NLP we consider an anchor to be the relationship between a stimulus or trigger and a mood: we learn to associate certain triggers with certain moods i.e. the trigger automatically causes our mood to change. And, especially here in the UK, many of us grow up in families where people treated wet and cool weather as a negative anchor – as a signal to feel gloomy or fed up. So children learned to do so, too.
Lifestyle
Lots of Northern Europeans take Mediterranean holidays in winter or spring. This is because, even though the weather isn’t usually warm enough for sunbathing or swimming at that time of year, they do get to spend more time out of doors – eating outside, drinking outside and just strolling about.
It lifts their spirits they say. Now this could involve Seasonal Affective Disorder but maybe, just maybe, it might be to do with the fact that ‘back home’ they would spend the time looking out at the rain (rather then buying good rain-proof clothing and spending more time outside…)
Expectations
From the depths of darkest winter many of us begin anticipating the balmy sunny days of summer; that period of three or four months of good weather which ‘keeps us going’. (Now in doing this we are, in effect discounting two-thirds of our year in the expectation of enjoying one third.) And when these expectations are not met – when this one-third of our year turns out to be wet and cool – we disappoint ourselves.
Rapport through misery
There’s a saying which goes roughly along the lines: ‘misery seeks companionship’. So if I’m miserable because of my response to the weather I’ll seek others who share my views and we’ll moan about it together. Instant rapport!
This may be why in the UK and Ireland we moan about the weather so much. It’s not so much that it’s all that bad – it’s just a great way of finding common ground with strangers. So at work, in queues, in waiting rooms, on buses and trains, etc., we can complain about the weather, about how our plans are spoiled, about how it affects us, about how this year’s weather is the worst for years, and about global warming e.g. “… and what about this here global warming then – we could do with a bit of that around here, I’m telling you!”
Who’s driving your bus?
When our moods are influenced by outside factors we’re not metaphorically driving our own buses. We’re back-seat passengers. Being driven along by other people, by the weather, by the media, and so on.
This is one of the key themes on our own Pegasus NLP ‘Core Skills’ course: how to begin driving one’s own bus more of the time rather than being a passive passenger. Because if my mood is being automatically influenced by factors over which I have no control then, obviously, I’m not in charge of me. Not a good place to be, really.
A while ago we were holidaying in south-west Cork. It was a warm June but on this day the weather changed and produced that special Irish version of rain – a steady, fine drizzle that can completely soak you in minutes. We were walking down Baltimore’s main street and passed our guesthouse. The elderly and very sprightly landlady was standing in her doorway, dressed in a wrap-around housecoat, looking out at the rain. I commented ‘Pity the weather’s changed!” to which she replied “Ah sure that’s lovely soft rain – good for the skin…”
She didn’t know about NLP and Reframing – she didn’t need to.
More about negative anchors or hot buttons:
The Swish Technique is one of the best way of defusing a negative anchor
How negative anchors operate in families and close relationships
Why ‘positive thinking’ doesn’t work with negative anchors
NLP and anchors in the supermarket…
An NLP technique for regaining your sense of perspective
Negative anchors – they are not our fault
Other articles related to NLP Anchors
Negative anchors and self esteem
Poor weather can be a negative anchor for some people
Anchoring and brands – how marketing uses anchors
Insomnia: the part anchoring plays in staying awake instead of being asleep
Great things about the rain!
Having beauty spots/footpaths all to myself
Jumping in puddles – I’ve never outgrown the urge and I always give in to it!
Not having to water the garden/veg patch
Not caring how I look – I already know look like Paddington on my rain gear and wellies!
The smell of wet countryside, clean & fresh
The smell of wet dog – um actually…strike that one!
Being terribly British and bravely going out in it anyway
Great observations, Clare. And on a good day for trying them out, too! 🙂
My map of the world tells me that anywhere north of Provence was not meant for human habitation.
‘Environment’ figures somewhere close to the forgotten lower levels of the NLP model but I think it has a huge influence on us. Rather than fighting a losing battle of believing that lousy weather can be reframed into something wonderful, why not use your NLP skills to find a way to relocate to a more hospitable climate. Or is that too scary?
Hi Graham: this post has had more comments than most others. Why? Because it was about the British weather, of course.
Move to sunnier climes??? Never!
We’d have nothing to talk about except how good it was to escape the traffic, the climate, the crowds, the crime, the Daily Mail (OK, well, maybe that’s an exception for ex-pats), the cost of living, the…………….. variety of living experiences you get through living in Britain 🙂
Hi Reg, When I read your last line my first take on it was ‘… variety of living expenses … ‘.
The wonderful British weather – a perfect topic for Eric Berne’s great game of ‘Ain’t it awful’; too cold, too hot, too wet but we need the rain or it will be time for hose-pipe bans … I’m baffled at how I’ve managed to survive the last 30 years without it. You’ve no idea of the price of sun-block these days – it really is time that someone did somethng about it.
I’d love to say more but I have to go now as I have another arduous day of beach inspection ahead of me. (Well, someone has to do it!)
Great comment Reg and Graham; when you move away you can always claim that: …but they don’t know how to do a proper British fry-up for brekky
😉
There will always be something to complain about somewhere for some people. Maybe some people think they have to judge something in order to be intelligent rather than just accepting, which might be seen to be weak. (?)
Hi Nikki: Why not also mention about Richard and the rain (which you sent in separate email).
BTW, I’ve had no problems with the comments function recently – nor any other reports of any. Did you fill in the ‘reCaptcha’ box, below?
Just found the recaptcha box: I could swear it wasn’t there yesterday (?)
Re: rain…
We’re getting lots of rain here in Melbourne (Australia), which makes Richard, my fiancee (a Brit) smile- “How many places in the world do you get people feeling *really* happy when it rains?!” he asks… Well, we’ve just had a big long drought, water reserves are low so we’re on water restrictions and there were *big* bushfires earlier this year so that might have something to do with it… 🙂
We live very near a national park & put on our wet weather gear & go for a walk & come back to yummy lamb shanks or home made soup or something we’ve popped in the oven beforehand & central heating- so we don’t really care if it rains when we go out for a walk… I don’t particularly fancy ‘winter foods’ in the hot weather so it’s perfect to come home to in the cold.
In the summer it was *stinking* hot: the week before the bushfires we had more than 10 days of over 43 degrees celcius; so we went walking on “our hill” really early before the heat which meant that we got to see wallabies (a smaller relative of the kangaroo)- they tend to hide in the shade & sleep during the day…
I know lots of people who use rain as a negative anchor, and I think it’s almost programmed into here in the UK! I too used to do this, but after reading about anchors last year I changed my view of rain and the winter period in general.
I have a friend who refuses to play golf if rain is forecast, and whilst it does frustrate me, I normally just respond with a comment like ‘Good job our skin is waterproof then eh’.
I still struggle when it starts to get dark at 4.30pm though during the winter, and that anchor doesn’t want to go anywhere!
I used to have the same response to the dark evenings, Mark, until I changed my mind…
It took a while. But over the last couple of years I seem to have reframed that quite well by looking at and appreciating what the earlier evenings steer me towards: a mainly indoor life after dark (whether at home or elsewhere) and the opportunity to do things which at this time of year (August) when It’s bright till after 9 pm I wouldn’t normally get round to doing.
And, to be honest, I hate the rain – always have. Whether in summer or in winter. Though what you said about waterproof skin struck a chord and made me realise it may not be the rain but simply wet clothes. So as a naturist I’d probably enjoy the rain more…. But that’s a step too far…