The ‘people helpers’ who talk too much!
One phenomenon that’s always fascinated me is the tendency for “people helpers” to talk too much…
- Coaches, counsellors
- Inspirational speakers
- HR people
They seem to think that if they’re not talking, and telling people what to do, they are not earning their living!
That’s a pity.
People helping is not about handing out advice!
Because, ideally, people helping is about enabling people to
- think for themselves
- find their own solutions
- find and utilise their own motivation to act
- and learn from their experiences.
This means that the “helper” needs to get them thinking for themselves. And this is best done asking thought-provoking questions.
Be judged by the results ‘they achieve’ – not the advice you give
As a ‘people helper’ you’re not paid by the word.
You’re paid by the results the other person achieves in their lives – as a result of your provocation, challenging and, especially, questioning!
This requires a lot more skill than just telling people what to do.
But it’s a lot more rewarding for both parties, in the long run.
See also: Communicating, Talking and Listening