Those ‘good eye contact’ myths
Those ‘good eye contact’ myths It would have been funny… .. if it weren’t so sad. He was trying really hard – the electrical goods salesman. He’d come through the one-size-fits-all …
The word ‘try’ – use it with caution
You can ‘try’ or you can ‘do’. If you’re going to do it you’ll say “Yes, I’ll do it!” If you don’t want to commit yourself, or you want to …
Closeness and carelessness in relationships
Carelessness can destroy relationships. The ‘people side of things’. Up until my early twenties, I did have trouble with the ‘people side of things’. Yes, I liked being with people …
Sulking: getting the silent treatment
Sulking: getting the Silent Treatment! Oh, he’s just having one of his sulks – best to ignore him. If she doesn’t get what she wants, she goes into a sulk …
A litmus test for friendship?
Think about a few recent conversations… A social one, not a business or work conversation. Okay, now replay the conversation in your mind – and consider: who, not what, did …
“The Archers” – Jill’s wisdom!
I am prepared to admit that my favourite, and only, soap opera is The Archers on BBC Radio 4. (The programme has been on air since January 1951 though I’ve …
Are you getting the ‘not interested’ treatment!
How those ‘not interested’ messages work. There are lots of subtle messages hidden in everyday conversations – even in seemingly light-hearted chit-chat! Some of these are verbal. Some, most even, …
That ‘look at me when I’m speaking to you’ rule
They need to look away to think. In conversation, lots of people need to look away to think. On the other hand, lots of other people get upset if their …
Aggressive agreement!
Conversational power tactic #2 The “aggressive agree-ers” seem to be on your side. After all, they agree with you! But they do it a bit too enthusiastically; so much so …
Using silence to control you
Conversational power tactic #1 People who use silence as a weapon in conversation want an audience. But they don’t like to be the audience. So, they’ll discourage you from making …
Falling out of love – and in again
Falling out of love – and then back in again Reading time 6 mins The first flush of love is great. It’s that heady and almost insane time when we …
NLP and ‘good intentions’
Good intentions aren’t good enough… “It’s not what you do…” The Fats Waller song goes T’Ain’t What You Do (It’s The Way That Cha Do It)… And it’s good advice when …
You’re not perfect anymore
Falling in – and then out of love I was standing outside a store at a shopping precinct near Bournemouth, idly looking at the people moving about among the rows …